That’s a Stephen Colbert quote that I’m pointing at London today because while it’s been so very good to us, its dizzy sidewalks make exploring it annoying as hell most of the time. Stay left? Stay right? Bugger it all!

When I first moved to Berkeley, California from the suburbs of Texas where one drives everywhere from the age of 15 and cops suspiciously scope any hapless pedestrian on its otherwise empty sidewalks, I was a lost fish. I had no idea how to walk around people!

I over-thunk every move I made. Silent battles were fought in my head: “Dear god, here comes a pedestrian, what do I do?!” Step to this side, step to that side…bump. “Sorry!” (walk quickly away like in an awkward teen movie.) This happened with skaters, bikers, you name it, until I finally got my land legs and realized that others will compensate for your trajectory. They realize the pace and direction you’re going and will adjust themselves accordingly. It’s cool, they won’t run into you nor you into them.

Now it’s Berkeley all over again in London, but that simple rule of physics no longer applies.

And it’s not because Londoners aren’t considerate. People seem to know how to wait for the Tube. For the most part, there’s no shoving, people are polite, and even when we’re all crammed like sardines for the morning commute, tall men will take conscientious measures to protect you from their armpits.

(The only exception to this general politeness is the couple of times I’ve seen people take up the seat next to them with their stupid bags full of cheap crap while the car fills up and it’s the only seat left. For some reason no one protested the rather large lady with bags taking up even more space than necessary in this way last time I saw this happen on the Piccadilly Line. They just gave her longing looks, and she just continued to ignore them.)

Anyway, the rule in London is supposed to be “stay left,” but it’s a total crap-shoot who actually does this. I tried to look for patterns, and in my totally unscientific, interrupted time-series observation, it appears that most of those who do are “native” Londoners, both of white and non-white persuasions. By “native” perhaps I mean people who grew up here from a young age (?).

London, being the uber-cosmopolitan city that it is, has people of all stripes walking its sidewalks, gazing at its historical buildings, getting lost in its crowds, and checking out the fabulously clad. Let’s face it, the majority of the world stays right when walking. This makes for a precarious journey on foot for an unassuming guest like myself. Given all the visitors from here and there, nobody knows what they’re doing!

A friend of mine advised to just throw my head down and charge full speed ahead, and let them worry about getting out of your way. I laughed at the time (first week in London), but now, six months later, it’s my new rule! Sad, but true.

If you’ve ever been caught behind a group of five people walking leisurely on a busy sidewalk, spanning across the entire thing, too busy laughing and announcing their thoughts loudly to hear your excuse-mes, it’s that kind of feeling. Nearly every corner you turn, someone is about to ram into your stomach and a hurried “sorry” is tossed over the shoulder.

So seriously, London, pick a damn side. Left or right. And stick to it! Your sidewalks look like a bunch of dizzy ants on a cookie! Otherwise, you’re quite lovely and we should have tea sometime.

Couldn’t just keep it limited to private email threads any longer:

Most people will be wondering in a few years why their student loans and their kids’ student loans never seem to go away, why we’re 75 and still working; not owning a home; no hope of retirement.

20 years ago, after the S&L taxpayer bailout (only $125 billion) they realized that the ‘middle class’ actually has more debt than assets, and they declared the decline of the middle class. They lamented that to be middle class means taking on massive debt for a home and college education beyond the value of your assets. I can only imagine what we’re in for now.

The government chooses to dole out corporate welfare, against social security money and the like. It’s amazing – if you’ve ever witnessed what the government puts a battered woman through to try to get welfare (approx. $300/month in CA), a nonchalant handout of this magnitude to a bunch of gamblers is beyond hateful.

Also interesting:

The same attorney who prosecuted Charles Manson (Vincent Bugliosi) wants to prosecute Bush for murder when he leaves office early next year. He’s enlisted a woman running for the Attorney General position in Vermont named Charlotte Dennett; if she wins they’re going for it.

I hadn’t heard these sirens and announcements for twenty six years until a friend sent this video to me. Enough time and memories have transpired that they supersede the anxiety I felt as a kid when such announcements came on during the Iran-Iraq war. But watching this video from Abjeez (you have to know Persian to understand) confirms that there are bad memories in the making for Iraqis – that is, for those who survive – and that sometimes you just need to bury your head in your hands and cry.

vicente to ponnie: turn it up and try to not watch the video…

ponnie to vicente: that cut has serious soul, man. serious soul. and smoooooth unlike any other. makes me crave a night on the town circa 1979.

My friend, Joui, told me that while she was in Chicago recently, she met a musician who told her about wild bunnies’ reactions to his music. He said that while he plays his guitar in the woods, the bunnies stay and listen…so long as he stays on key. As soon as he plays out of tune, they hop away.

So she concluded that “the bunnies know.”

Indeed, they do.

If you haven’t heard, you must. That is all.

Back before the invention of stereos, popular musicians were employed by royalty to basically act as their very own human stereos.

Take the case of Luigi Rodolfo Boccherini (February 19, 1743 – May 28, 1805), a classical era composer and cellist from Italy. Boccherini was born in Lucca, Italy, in a musical family. At a young age his father, a cellist and double bass player, sent Luigi to study in Rome (1757), and after various concert tours, in 1769 his talents brought him to the Spanish court in Madrid, where he was employed by Don Luis, the younger brother of King Charles III. (Courtesy of last.fm).

Listen.

Is interesting.

On the one hand, the City Council unanimously passed a symbolic resolution
opposing a military strike against Iran, calling on Congress to stop the Bush administration from such an attack.

On the other hand, the Editor of the Oakland Tribune was assassinated a few months ago and a woman was carjacked last night at 6 pm…all down the block.

Oakland has the extreme good and bad of everything. It is very much alive.

“…the task of being aware of the constitution has been outsourced from citizens’ ownership to being the domain of professionals such as lawyers and professors…”

~Naomi Wolf from 10 Steps to Close Down an Open Society